Cancer Will Never Defeat Dad. Dad Update 1/21/2015

"In 2015 I start a year of gratitude. Instead of focusing on the how and the why...I focus on the change. I focus on the thankfulness of being where I am despite the journey that was walked. No more I wants, or please God's. But instead, I start and end with 'Thank You God'. " 
Dana Hurst

Dana Hurst is a fellow brain cancer caregiver and blogger, who lost her husband to the evil that is brain cancer. I read her blog often, and can't help but think there are times where she is speaking right to me. Letting me read the words I so badly needed, not necessarily wanted, to hear. 

Gratitude.

Giving gratitude to a God who has placed this brain cancer journey in my life. Giving gratitude to a power much greater than any doctor or treatment. And giving gratitude to a God who has watched as my family has struggled with the suffering that cancer involves. 

But not only does Dana Hurst talk about giving gratitude, she also talks about the fight against suffering. She says:
"My fight. To not let suffering win. To not let it take away the joy in my faith. To not let it affect the relationships in my life. To instead, take it for its own run and use it to make me better. To allow it to show me when I am weak. To embrace those weaknesses when they are near and become stronger for it."

Giving gratitude for this fight. The fight against suffering. 

That's the exact attitude my family has had since that devastating day in October, when we learned Dad had stage IV cancer, and that's the exact attitude we will continue to have as Dad battles against this disease. To not let suffering win.

Cancer will never defeat Dad. Cancer can never defeat someone who does not lose faith. Cancer can never defeat someone who does not let suffering win. Cancer can never defeat someone who does not allow suffering to take away the joy in their faith. Cancer will never defeat my family.

As Dad starts another round of chemo on Monday, and another Avastin treatment on Tuesday, we are once again reminded of the fight we have ahead of us, we are once again reminded that brain cancer treatment has become part of our normal routine. The days can be difficult, the treatment painful, but we continue to give gratitude and be thankful the treatments are working, thankful Dad is feeling well,and thankful for these last 15 months.

Asking for a few extra prayers, as treatment week is always a little tough on Dad physically and mentally. Continuing with our motto, that we will never once deny the diagnosis, instead we will fight like hell to defy the verdict!

And tomorrow, a very sweet woman starts her fight against brain cancer. Asking for a few extra prayers to her, and her family. With 6 weeks of radiation and chemotherapy, the side effects can be tough, that I will not deny, but I know with their unbelievable amount of faith, strength, and an amazing support system, she is going to BTHO Brain Cancer!


Please continue praying, as we continue fighting to BTHO Brain Cancer!

An Understanding. 1/12/2015

Yesterday I stood next to two incredible women, as we discussed their battles against cancer. And Friday I answered numerous questions about Dad's treatment and side effects, as a wife and mother was diagnosed with the same type of tumor as Dad. During these interactions I realized one thing, we all have this incredible understanding with one another. We just get it. 

An understanding. A mutual agreement between two people. A way of knowing exactly what someone is going through, without even saying a word. 

That's what I've gained these last 15 months. An understanding with so many others.

When Dad as diagnosed with brain cancer, more specifically glioblastoma-multiforme, I literally had no idea what that would involve. I had never heard of anyone with brain cancer, and I sure as heck had never heard of "glioblastoma". I did very little research those first few months, only enough to understand the treatment options and only enough to not scare the ever living life out of me. 

We were blindly finding our way through the battle. We struggled. We failed. And, we are now at a place where we feel like we are succeeding. Not succeeding because Dad's MRI's are stable, succeeding because we are slowly understanding the treatment, the side effects, and options for Dad. I research daily. The statistics no longer scare me. The side effects no longer give me a gut wrenching feeling. Instead, they continue to give me hope. 

Hope because I constantly read stories of survival, hope because I constantly read of clinical trials which are WORKING, and hope because we are not alone- even though we felt so incredibly alone those first few months. 

The struggle we faced those first few months of trying to figure it all out, what an incredible blessing it has all been! Those first few months seem to be a bit of a blur, as I was struggling in so many ways with Dad's battle- trying to regain my faith, trying to come to terms with the word "cancer", and trying to keep it all together for my family. But we've come so far since October 2013, we don't have all the answers, but we have some, and we may not have it all completely figured out, but we are getting better each day. 

The true blessing that we gained those first few months during our struggle, is that now we are able to help others faced with the battle against brain cancer. We are able to answer the questions we always forgot to ask during doctor's appointments, and we are able to just be there and listen as they talk through their diagnosis. 

Hearing of a recent glioblastoma diagnosis does take me back to that moment when we realized Dad had a tumor, when we realized the tumor was cancer, and when we realized the battle we had ahead. That moment was terrifying, that moment still brings knots to my stomach, but that moment also makes me realize how far we've come in our battle. It gives me hope that others faced with that terrifying moment will see the light at the end of the tunnel. 

Our life isn't perfect, and in reality, it's far from perfect. We struggle each day with Dad's diagnosis, the side effects of the tumor and treatment, and understanding our new normal. We've learned to lean on people who have gone through the battle before us, and because of that, we are more than happy for others to lean on us during their battles. 

The treatments continue, and in our life, they will never stop. We will continue to have MRI's, battles against the side effects of the chemo and bi-weekly trips for Avastin. That has all become our new normal. And what a beautiful normal it really has become. 

Asking for a few extra prayers for some pretty incredible people in my life, those who have been battling cancer for a while, and those newly diagnosed. The road is difficult, with so many unknowns, but know there are people who "just get it" and are with you on this ride.

Continue praying, as we continue fighting to BTHO Brain Cancer!

Eyes Wide Open. 1/8/2015

The other day Mom asked me, "Do you think brain cancer is just so much more common now? Why do I keep hearing about it so often."

Mom has a good point. In the time that Dad has been diagnosed with brain cancer (just 15 months ago), I know of 2 others diagnosed with brain cancer. Is it that brain cancer is much more common, or is it because my eyes are now open, wide open, to this battle? 

When I hear of a recent diagnosis my stomach literally is in knots. It takes me right back to that cold hospital room where we found out Dad's tumor was malignant, where we found out it was Stage IV brain cancer, and where the word "cancer" literally took my breath away. 

I go back to the person I was 15 months ago and I don't think I recognize her anymore. I've changed. I've become more aware of the battle so many others face. I've become more aware of my faith in a power much greater than any power here on earth. And I've become aware of HOPE.

Hope and hopelessness are both options when faced with difficult battles. And I will not deny my heart was filled with hopelessness those weeks following Dad's diagnosis. But as the time passed, as I read stories of others who not only survived, but THRIVED, I started filling my heart with hope. I started to realize that when chances are one in a million, you FIGHT to be that one. Dad has NEVER lost his fight. And that gives me HOPE. 

As I received the news of another brain cancer diagnosis, as my heart sank, and as my thoughts were filled with such sadness for the family, I quickly turned to my devotional:
"Trust in me forever, for I am the rock eternal. It is easy to trust Me for a while- especially when things are going well in your life. But I am calling you to trust in Me at all times, no matter what is happening. I understand what a difficult assignment this is, and I know that you will sometimes fail in this venture...Let this assurance of My unfailing Love draw you back to Me- back to trusting Me...You can rely on Me! When your walk through this world feels wobbly, remember that I am your Rock. I always provide a stable place for you to stand. I can easily bear all your weight, including the weight of your problems. So come to Me when you are feeling heavy laden with worries. I invite you to lean on Me- trusting Me with all your heart and mind."

Dad's diagnosis, and the countless others who are diagnosed with brain cancer, are exactly WHY I run for the rose. The funding and awareness for brain cancer is saving countless lives and giving those diagnosed with brain cancer QUALITY of life. Dad is living proof that the money raised by the Dr. Marnie Rose Foundation is impacting so many, in such a positive way. I hope you can all help in supporting the Dr. Marnie Rose Foundation in making a donation to support brain cancer research, research that is so badly needed, research that is without a doubt saving lives, and research that is on the brink of finding a cure!

Visit our team page, join us for the run/walk, or make a donation to help support so many families, just like mine, who are fighting to BTHO Brain Cancer!
http://runfortherose.racepartner.com/run-for-the-rose/bthobraincancer

Our Year In Review. Looking Back At 2014.

2014 has been an incredible year for the Glenz Family. We've witnessed the power of prayer and Dad's unbelievable determination to BTHO Brain Cancer, and we welcomed a little boy to our family- Luke James Lechler.

Let's start with our new little one, which means a new title for me- AUNT! Luke James Lechler was due on 1/10/2015, although he didn't want any of us to wait to meet him, so on 12/22/2014, we received a wonderful early Christmas gift. Our hearts are so full for this little boy! He was 5 lbs, 12 ounces and 19 1/2 inches long- perfect! Mom, Dad and baby are all home and doing great!

And Dad. I can't even begin to describe all of the emotions we've experienced this past year. We've had days filled with laughter and praise, and also days filled with sadness and fear. Our journey has been so far from easy, although the ride has been pretty darn incredible. As 2014 turned out to be one of the most difficult years for myself and my family, I can't help but look back and think of it as one of the best years of my life. 

Through the pain and tears, I've learned a lot about myself, my family and our friends. I've learned that throughout the bad times, I've managed to find the good- I've learned that I'm stronger than I ever imagined I would have to be- and I've learned that sometimes you need a little bit of coffee and a whole lotta Jesus to get through some days. And my family, words can't even begin to describe how proud I am of my family, especially Mom and Dad. They have stood by one another throughout it all, and they continue to lean on one another for love and support. And finally, our friends. Friends who have brought us meals when Dad was going through treatment, friends who have supported us during our efforts to bring awareness and funding to brain cancer research, and friends who have listened in moments when we just needed to talk. I thank you all for helping us battle through this last year.

And so, I look forward towards 2015 and wonder what amazing things God has in store for my life, along with my family's life. We continue with treatments and MRIs, and we continue to find the blessings in each day. We've learned how to relate to so many others battling cancer, and we've learned what an amazing support system we have in others who know our fight. 

We never know what the future holds, but I'm so blessed I've been able to follow this journey surrounded by so many people who love and care for me, along with my family. 

Dad had another MRI Monday, and Tuesday we received the wonderful news that the MRI was stable! There have been no significant changes to the MRI, and we are thrilled! Another round of chemo started this week, and we continue to pray for the treatments to continue working. Please keep praying, as we keep fighting to BTHO Brain Cancer!

Wishing everyone a blessed 2015!

Enjoying The Rain. Dad Update 12/17/2014

The scripture says, "Rain falls on the just AND the unjust." Even when you have faith, you'll still have difficulties, but when the storms come, you will not be defeated. 

The rain has fallen hard on our lives these last 14 months. Much harder than I ever imaged it would fall, although we've learned how to weather the storm, we've learned to not be defeated, and we've learned to enjoy the rain. 

This weekend I completed my first half-marathon. 
I ran a total of 13.1 miles in 2 hours and 30 minutes. Around mile 11, I realized that I was truly crazy.

But, I was running with a purpose. That morning I made sure to wear my "THINK GREY" shirt and a hot pink head band, all to honor a few people in my life who are fighting to BTHO Cancer. And as my legs started to hurt, and my mind was telling me that I needed to stop, I kept focusing on these individuals and continued to grab my two bracelets- one that read 'No One Fights Alone' and the other that read 'Running For Lar'. It reminded me that as I was fighting to BTHO 13.1 miles, as many others were fighting to BTHO Cancer- and that gave me the strength and determination to finish the run. 

I ended the weekend on an unbelievable high, as I was so incredibly proud of myself for setting a goal and completing my first half-marathon. And the good news and smiles continued, as Dad had another great appointment with his Oncologist, Dr. Fleener, yesterday.

We scheduled our next treatment and MRI, which will take place after Christmas and decided to really focus on the Christmas holiday surrounded by friends and family, and not focus on the upcoming scan results. We decided that we would instead, enjoy the our time in the rain.

We also had the chance yesterday to give something back to the Cancer Clinic, to all the nurses and staff who have answered our numerous phone calls about Dad's treatment, who have helped me in filing appeals and fighting insurance claims, and who have comforted us during our treatment sessions. I remember walking back to the chemo center for the first time after Dad's tumor showed progression, and I was in tears. And then I remember one of the nurses coming up to me, giving me a hug and telling me that they were going to take great care of my Dad. It didn't make the tears completely stop, but it gave me comfort in knowing someone truly cared about my Dad and was going to help take care of him. We aren't a number at the Cancer Clinic, we are The Glenz Family, and for that I am so incredibly thankful. 

We handed out Christmas wine glasses to each person at the Cancer Clinic, and we received so many hugs and smiles in return. It was an amazing feeling.

As we finished up the last decorations in the house, and wrapped up the remaining gifts for loved ones, we can't help but look back at this last year and give thanks for the rain. 

Because of the rain we appreciate the holiday season more than we could have ever imagined. Because of the rain we appreciate one another more than we could have ever imagined. And because of the rain, we've learned to find the good in the storm, and we've learned to dance throughout it all. 

Wishing you all a wonderful Christmas, and asking for continued prayers as we fight to BTHO Brain Cancer!

"Scanxiety". Dad Update 12/8/2014

Scanxiety.

Our next scan is approaching more quickly than I would like, and as often as I tell myself to not live from one MRI to the next, the anxiety associated with any type of scan in the cancer world is always terrifying. 

You go through so many emotions leading up to the scan, as each scan can bring a huge amount of relief, or a huge amount of fear. I have a verse taped on my computer screen at work: "They do not fear bad news, they confidently TRUST the Lord to care for them." (Psalm 112:7). And yes, I confidently TRUST- but I don't think anyone who is waiting for the results of a MRI/PET/CAT scan can say that this trust completely takes away all of the fear and anxiety. The fear and anxiety is still there, and you attempt to cope with it as best as you possibly can, and that's all you can do. You say a prayer, hope for the best and know that no matter what the results show, you've got a pretty amazing God leading you down this path. I try to remind myself that fear can keep us up all night, but Faith makes one great pillow!

12/5/2014 marked 14 months in our journey against brain cancer. 14 months marks the median survival rate for Glioblastoma patients, which is a number that I am fighting so hard to change, and a number I'm praying each day that Dad surpasses. 

Last week was a tough week for Dad, as chemo week is always a little difficult. The side effects of the treatment make him so incredibly tired and he fights each day for strength to do "normal" things around the house. The week of chemo is not only difficult on Dad, but also on Mom. I sometimes think we forget about the caregivers for those going through cancer, the toll it can take on them mentally and physically. Sometimes we forget that caregivers see it all, we sit in treatment centers- surrounded by others in the same battle we face every day-, we see the side effects of the treatments, and we see the statistics of the disease we battle. Some days are just downright difficult for caregivers, and sometimes I'm not sure that others 100% understand that. 

The things most people complain about, the struggles most people have, I promise all those in the Cancer Clinic would be more than happy to take on, instead of fighting for their lives. And as much as I wish each and every time I step foot in the Cancer Clinic that I wasn't going there, that our lives didn't revolve around Avastin and Temodar (chemo) treatments and the upcoming MRIs, I also remind myself that things could be worse. I remind myself that there is always, ALWAYS, something to be thankful for. 

Dad has continued to fight since day 1, and I've seen and experienced things in my life that I would never wish upon anyone, but I've learned so much about myself, my strength, and my faith these last 14 months. I've learned to see the positive in our situation, I've learned that I can relate to so many others in their battles against cancer, and I've learned that I'm much stronger than I ever thought I would have to be. 

The 14 month mark means so much to me, as I have never wanted Dad to be part of THAT statistic, instead part of the long term survivors statistic and part of the HOPE for a cure. I want Dad to be that percent that shocks the doctors and research, I want Dad to prove that he can and will beat this disease. 

"Part of winning the battle against cancer is hope, faith, determination, strength and keeping positive. The other part of winning the battle is a great medical team on your side. I learned early on that stats are just numbers and I'm more than a number. I'm a strong human being with inner strength and an iron-clad determination to fight to win. Stats don't tell you about the human behind the fighter who possesses the will and strength to fight, win and overcome."

Continue your thoughts and prayers for Dad, and all those fighting against cancer- thoughts and prayers for better days ahead and thoughts and prayers for great scan results! The "scanxiety" will never completely go away, but I hope all those fighting against the fear and anxiety can remember that there's a little something comforting about a billion stars held steady by a God who knows what he is doing. 

Continue praying, as we continue fighting to BTHO Brain Cancer!

Why I Run For The Rose. Update 12/1/2014

Many of you know our story. On October 5, 2013 Dad experienced a seizure in our kitchen, and soon after we learned the seizure was caused by a tumor in his left temporal lobe, a tumor that is considered one of the most aggressive forms of cancer- Glioblastoma Multiforme (GBM). 

We were devastated. We were confused. And we were lost. 

We questioned a lot of things- how could this happen to our family? How could this happen to our Dad? We didn't understand what a Glioblastoma diagnosis meant, we didn't understand all the terminology associated with a cancer diagnosis- but we found an organization that did, we found the Dr. Marnie Rose Foundation.

The devastation and confusion seemed to fade, as we quickly realized we weren't alone in our fight. We were surrounded by a group of individuals who knew exactly what we were up against, we were surrounded by others in the brain cancer community. And for the first time, I was given hope in Dad's fight. Hope for a cure, and I was able to turn the energy I was using being devastated, confused and lost into a purpose- Brain Cancer Awareness. 

Our first trip to 'Run For The Rose' seemed a bit "thrown together". We didn't know what were doing, and I sure as heck had no idea how to be an organized team captain. But with a lot of help from friends and family, we raised $10,000 and had over 50 team members supporting Dad. It was an unbelievable experience.

So here we are, our 2nd trip to 'Run For The Rose' is upon us, and I'm more excited and MUCH more prepared this time! I would love for each of you to join us that day- come experience a day that means so much to my family, and so many other families who are fighting against brain cancer. 

The event is held in Houston on April 12. 2015 and is truly a family friendly event, with face painting, activities and lots of food! And...if you register TODAY you can save $5 by using the code 'CYBER5'. 

Last year we helped raise $10,000, and I would love to do the same this upcoming year! So please join our team, make a donation, purchase a 'Team Lar' t-shirt, or send lots of prayers our way for a successful trip! 
(If you would like to order a 'Team Lar' t-shirt, please email me at glenzwhitney@gmail.com.)

And visit our team page to help us BTHO Brain Cancer! 
http://runfortherose.racepartner.com/run-for-the-rose/bthobraincancer

Continue praying, as we continue fighting to BTHO Brain Cancer!

Dad Update: Dad starts another round of chemotherapy today, and another Avastin treatment tomorrow. We continue to pray Dad feels well and the treatment is working to suppress any tumor growth. We look forward to another wonderful holiday season with Dad!